I was sitting in a local cafe near the window, minding my own business. It was mid-afternoon. Scribbling in my journal, I caught sight of a someone inching toward me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw an older man with a balding, white-haired crown looking down at me.
He gestured to the copy of Storyworthy by Matthew Dicks on the table between us. "My daughter just got me a subscription to that" he said without preamble. I told him I'd just recently started reading the book and wasn't aware there was an accompanying subscription. He said he was enjoying it so far—that I should look into it.
It was a short interaction but a friendly one. At first I thought maybe he'd been itching for social interaction of any kind, and had used the book as an easy-in. But then it made me wonder why there had to be a reason. Maybe he thought nothing of it—spotting the book, commenting on it, then going about his day.
I published an essay this week called What Lonely Men Won't Say Online (Or In-Person) where I talked about recognizing my own isolation recently.
Since becoming aware of it, I'm making an effort to be more open to social interaction. I hadn't realized how closed off I'd become... not just to strangers, but to small opportunities for connection in general like this one. I’m trying to work on being more open again, even if it feels a bit awkward at first.
A particular phrase from Dr. Daniel Siegel has helped me use my awareness to do something about it.
- Name it – give it a label.
- Claim it – take ownership.
- Tame it – respond with action.
onward.
-dmac