Refocusing
Exploring what you want and what's worth your time.
There's a hummingbird that stops by in the mornings to check on the flowers.
Today, I watched from the table inside. I worried sitting outside on the deck might keep him from showing up.
I like to think we're friends... but, maybe "acquaintance" is the better term. Like the guy who walks past me each day with his dog. We greet each other, sure. Offer a friendly smile and maybe some small talk. But we don't know the other person's name.
Looking out the window, I realized that I have no idea how to tell a hummingbird's gender. Either way, that little dude dutifully zips through his gardening to-do list.
Watching, I thought about how your to-do list really is how you spend your life. I was overdue on making sure there's stuff I like on there. I wasn't staring at my laptop screen so much as I was staring past it. Refocusing on my laptop in front of me, I noticed that stuff's been piling up on my to-do list. Not because I wasn't getting things done, but from all the new stuff popping up as I go.
When that happens, I've learned not to wait to do something about it. Getting off of the treadmill is top priority.
Oliver Burkeman, best-selling author of Four Thousand Weeks, frames it like this: “Decide in advance what to fail at. Getting to everything on your to-do list is a myth. Choose what to drop or life will choose for you”
So I did—I gave myself 30 minutes to clear the mental clutter using a simple system I’ve come to love for its clarity:
- list everything floating in your head
- circle the 5 most important.
- grumble a bit, you can have 3 of them.
I've worked with enough execs to know that what people think they want and what they actually want are almost never the same thing. So I tried to make sure I didn't fall into the same trap.
When looking at what would be required of me to achieve the things I say I want, I looked for the levers that would maximize my effort. Then at the impact it would create. I asked myself:
- What is this in service of?
- Is that what I want?
- Is it worth it?
The hummingbird will be back tomorrow, taking stock of his tiny patch. Even though he flaps his wings a ton, he pauses before taking off in a new direction. I like to think he's batching tasks to make life a little easier. Maybe he's just stopping to smell the flowers.
Do you know what you want? Or what's worth your time to get it?
onward.
-dmac