This is... I don't know what this is.
It's late (again) and each footstep is echoing off the bare walls and wooden floors. The glare of the overhead light is... a lot. Especially when bouncing off the windows.
Was it always like this?
Finishing the move-out after work this week has been thoroughly exhausting, but I'm finally wrapping up. After I'm done cleaning the place, I still have an hour drive, though, so I probably won't get home until after midnight.
At least I'm almost done, right?
I really suck at moving. For someone who's done it a lot, I just absolutely can't stand it. And I'm so sick of doing it alone. Dragging the Swiffer wet jet thing back and forth across the floor, I'm thinking about the Christmas tree and wondering if the new folks will put it there or somewhere else. It took a few tries but, eventually, my comfy chair landed in the spot that gets the best light. I'm thinking about the life I led here. Movie nights. Strong coffee and a whole lot of life-altering conversations. I read tons and tons of books. I didn't host all that many people, though—I planned to, but it just didn't play out how I thought.
Shadows are congregating in the corners of the room. The Swiffer squeaks and I pause a second to stand up and stretch. I let out a longgg sigh. My chest is convulsing like I might burst into tears but my heart rate is steady.
I... I don't know what this is.
Sadness? Gratitude?
Disappointment?
Nervousness?
Nodding, I grab the Swiffer with both hands and exhale through my nose.
It's time.
Here's to this place—
To closing out this chapter.
* * *
I thought I'd be more upset than this—and I am—but I'm also really excited for what's next.
onward.
For more on this daily column, read the backstory here. And if you know someone who'd appreciate this, pass it along.