I never really get to feel the moment I’m in.
It's something I'm working on. Actually, I've been working on it for what feels like my entire life. And I'm pretty tired of feeling so jaded by life’s ups and downs.
“This too shall pass” seems like a diuretic for grief.
I want to hate that idiom so much.
It drives me completely nuts, even though it's true. Because things don't get better on their own... it's not like time actually solves problems; people do. Problems get skipped, patched, or solved with the time and resources available to us. And we even celebrate achievement and special occasions much in the same way.
So, something that really bothers me is having the wherewithal to zoom out, when shit happens, and the ability to contextualize my own little ripple within the bigger pond. Sure, it's useful, but sometimes I just want to feel like shit, you know? Or be elated. But I want to be able to experience those things without then blinking and discovering I've justified my way back to baseline without meaning to.
So yes, I’ll keep putting one foot in front of the other.
But in a minute. Or, like... maybe a week.
Perhaps a month.
Who knows.
* * *
Do you feel before you defuse?
onward.
For more on this daily column, read the backstory here. And if you know someone who'd appreciate this, pass it along.